How to Adopt a Healthy and Good Parenting Style?
A parenting style is a result of interactions between parents and children. The primary focus here is on how parents respond to their child’s needs, demands, requests, and other behaviours. Some parents may adopt a laid-back attitude with their kids whereas others may set clear cut rules with serious repercussions.
Sometimes people in their attempt to be the “best friend parent” may grant their children all the freedom with no consequences. This may look cool from afar but can have harmful consequences in the long run. Every parent adopts a different parenting style and their style may even differ from one child to the other child.
TYPES OF PARENTING STYLES
There are four kinds of parenting styles:
1. Authoritarian: Authoritarian patents are typically strict. They try to exercise great control over their children’s lives. These kinds of parents set rigid rules for behaviour and monitor their children accordingly. They are demanding and have high expectations from their children. There is little to no scope for children to approach their parents or for friendly and open discussions between the two.
Debates over anything set by the parents are discouraged and they typically adopt the “because I said so” phrase while dealing with their children.
2. Permissive: Permissive or lenient parents usually don’t restrict their children. They quickly grant their kids permission for almost everything. They are usually lenient and try to act more like a “friend” than a caregiver. Children of permissive parents tend to be spoiled and irresponsible. They have all the freedom in the world so may have difficulty following rules in school.
3. Neglectful: Parents who adopt this parenting style usually ignore their children. Sometimes, they are so busy with their own life that they fail to pay attention to their kids. Kids are usually responsible for themselves from a young age in many ways. They do not receive any feedback or advice from parents. They are free to do whatever they want without their parents noticing. Working parents may ignore their kids. Such kids usually have trouble trusting people and forming new bonds.
4. Authoritative: People who adopt this parenting style seem to build a healthy network of relationship between themselves and their children. Such parents usually set ground rules for behaviour but explain them with logic. They ensure that their children understand the reasoning behind such rules. Authoritative parents set up a platform for friendly debate, giving their children a chance to prove themselves. Their children usually turn out to be independent and confident adults and have faith in their ability to handle difficult situations.
Which Style is the best?
Research suggests that authoritative parenting is the most effective. This parenting style allows for communication and understanding to flow both ways. Parents allow their children to challenge them and also to learn from their mistakes. They guide them and offer advice instead of ignoring problematic behaviours or being too restrictive. Such children usually turn into self-confident and responsible adults as they trust their ability to navigate through the world.
They possess the confidence and sense of initiative. Authoritative parents also act as a reliable support system these kids can fall back on in dire times. Sometimes parents may adopt a combination of these styles and styles may differ from child to child.
The best way to adopt this style is:
1. Create an environment where there is space to learn and grow from mistakes.
2. Set ground rules with logical reasoning so your child understands not just what he has to do but why he must do it.
3. Be open to answering any questions your child has. This also develops their critical thinking and reasoning process.
4. Encourage your children to take initiative in different areas of their lives so they can become independent adults.
5. Create a space where there is two-way communication between the two parties. Sometimes children are afraid to approach their parents in fear of being told off. In the case of neglectful parenting, children don’t approach their parents under most circumstances.
6. Give your children feedback so they realize what kind of behaviours are appropriate. Appreciate their victories in all areas to build their self-esteem.
7. Let your children know their limit.
Children are likely to break rules no matter how many explanations you offer. It’s up to the parent to ensure that they don’t make a habit out of it. Children are still learning and are prone to mistakes. Parents need to encourage their children to adopt healthier attitudes and pay close attention to other factors influencing their children.
• Parenting styles are classified into four types: authoritative, authoritarian, permissive and neglectful.
• Authoritative parenting is nurturing whereas authoritarian parenting is restrictive.
• Permissive parents allow their children to do as they please.
• Neglectful parents ignore their children’s emotional needs.
• Authoritative parenting is said to be the most effective in raising independent children.