How can I focus on my child’s academics without focussing on the marks?

How can I focus on my child’s academics without focussing on the marks?

As a parent, it is normal for you to worry about your child’s performance at school because that’s the foundation for their future. But what parents always forget, that number never define the depth of knowledge. So the grades or marks your kid scores is basically the capacity of his/her memory and focusing on the marks will never let your child focus on the academics.

The education system in modern times believes that a student who scores the most marks or grades is intelligent and better than the rest. But factually, graders are just an accumulation of credibility, tests, physical performance, assignments and discipline or other factors varying from one institute to another.

They barely reflect or concentrate upon the amount of learning and knowledge of the child. So parents need to start focusing on the academics and not the marks of the child. Here are a few things to start with:

Academics Over Marks:

Adjust the peer pressure:

Parents tend to compare the marks of their kid with that of their friends. In that way, a pressure is created on the child to score high eventually not focusing much on the learning but ways to earn a few more marks.

 Therefore, you need to stop creating a peer pressure on your kid and help them to know that what they scored is not the true reflection of their learning and know it yourself too.

teen in class

Will this appear in the finals?

Now when you question yourself something like that, all you are doing is preparing to score and preparing yourself lesser for the knowledge to get in. Learn everything that’s there. One thing at a time. When you learn it, you tend to remember it and you’ll at least be able to produce it on the paper in your own words with understanding. In this way, your kid concentrates on learning and automatically score more marks which constitute on the academics.

Help with evolving projects/ assignments:

The one-time project or tasks that are given to your child ask them to do something that they already know or have heard in the class. It does not make them learn the topic instead simply reproduce it.

Let your child do a topic where he/she needs to first research, write a bibliography, the thesis, the outline and the results. In this way you as a parent while helping them, tend to focus on their academic task and not on the score. Give them feedback for it and not mere marks for every step.

Talk about the future requirements:

When you have a conversation about what will contribute to their future skills and problem-solving capacity, it always be what they learn academically, be it sports, group work, meeting deadlines, knowledge of the subject, discipline, presentation skills and the rest over the results on the scorecard. The outcome of academics relates to their future goals and not the grades.

Focus on what does the child want and not the lecturer:

As a parent when you focus on what your child needs to excel and not what the teacher does, to give him a better grade, your concentration automatically shifts from marks to academics.

Your child will surely need understanding, reasoning, confidence to perform, things outside the contents of the test paper and the rest to be able to make up a position for themselves.

Know that grades are a result of academics:

Parents need to know that marks are scored when your kid scores academically. When they learn, they are more confident and prepared when compared to just memorizing stuff for the numbers. It tend to know that even if your kid’s resume glows up with marks and they fail to answer the basic questions of knowledge during an interview they still fail it. Know that good academic performance, follows good marks.



I agree though that Examination is the backbone of school administration, let the day of examination be like any other day in their life. As parents, never tell your child that “write your exams very well and get good marks”. By doing this you literally putting a lot of pressure on the child for marks.

Instead, tell him “All the best” and give him a tight hug so that you can give him the confidence.  And when marks come, tell him he has done a good job.  If he has got good marks then fine other-wise hug him and tells, I am happy with you because you worked hard and got these marks.

Moreover, it could be made a practice to follow proficiency in the learning system to avoid excessive concentration on grades and more on the learning process and the outcome of the student to each process. As a parent, you do not have to worry about the grades, although it is suggested that you focus more on the academic of your child. Happy Learning.


1. Grades are an outcome of better academics.
2. Grades could not meet your future requirements completely until your knowledge is up to it.
3. Concentrate on stuff outside the contents of the final paper as well.
4. Please your brain and not train it for pleasing the lecturer to give you a better score.

How can I focus on my child’s academics without focussing on the marks?

Academics Over Marks

Adjust the peer pressure

Will this appear in the finals?

Help with evolving projects/ assignments

Talk about the future requirements

Focus on what does the child want and not the lecturer

Know that grades are a result of academics



Malathi A Ganesh is a B. Com Graduate, NTT, M.A (Lit), PGDEA (PG in Education Administration), PGDCA (PG Diploma in Computer Application), DTE (Diploma in Teaching English), ICEPT (International Certificate in Education Preschool Teaching) from Singapore and B. Ed. She has been in the field of education for the past 20 years and has an experience of running her own pre-school She is the Founder & Director Academics of Smartkidz Educare India Pvt Ltd with 275+ play schools Pan India. She is an Educationist and a Child Psychologists by profession who wants to fulfill her dream of giving Quality Education to children in their earlier years. She is also into conducting positive parenting workshops, which talks about effective child rearing. She has conducted numerous parenting workshops in all her pre schools, schools and MNC’s.

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