How can you handle tricky conversations with your teens?

How can you handle tricky conversations with your teens?

Having a conversation with teenagers can sometimes be very difficult. They no longer just listen to what you say but want answers regarding everything. You might not be comfortable in talking about everything with your child.

The same goes with them as well. It’s normal to feel uncomfortable to talk to your child about topics like sex or drugs. But it’s important that you have these conversations as it provides direction and guides your children towards the right path.

Having full knowledge of something helps them make sensible and responsible decisions. Difficult or tricky conversations might include anything sensitive, controversial, upsetting or embarrassing either for you or your kid or both.

Such conversations usually lead to an argument due to difference of opinions. Topics such as sex, sexual orientation, alcohol, and drugs are some of them. It’s better to be prepared in advance as to what are you going to talk to them about.

There’s not a readymade material available to help you out in talking about these topics. Each child’s perception is different about the different things and their way of handling it is different as well.

conversations with your teens

What you can do is, have some key points ready so that you aren’t caught off-guard. Be prepared with solutions to what they might argue about or question you. It’s usually a good idea to raise topics before your budding teenager asks you. It prevents any future problems and miscommunication.

• Staying calm and communicating with patience is the first step to have a good start towards a healthy conversation. Even if the issue or topic shocks you, try and maintain a calm composure and hear them out first. Let them share their opinion about it and then assess them based on it.

Once you have heard them out completely you can give your opinion about the subject and tell them what’s right and what’s wrong. Remember to hear them out with an open mind.

• It’s very important that you listen to your child. Not just listen but listen with understanding. All they want is to be heard. While listening, listen with patience.

• Don’t interrupt them in between or make any wrong comments. Avoid being judgmental or critical about what they have to say. Don’t try and find a solution midway, wait for them to complete their part before you start giving out solutions.

• They key to a successful conversation is being assertive and having an effective communication. Try and implement that.

• While talking about some topics such as internet safety or sex might fetch you a bored look or eye-rolling from your kid but don’t get agitated instead keep your calm and ask them to keep an open mind.

• Don’t act negatively upon what your teen has to say. If you are facing any difficulty with what he has said and would like to talk to another adult before talking to them, then do it.

• Set a time for later but don’t postpone it for the next day. Schedule it sometime later that day, it’ll show that you are sincere and serious about this and not avoiding it. Instead, you wish to address it and come to a consensus.

• If your child has some specific issues and doesn’t know much about it then work with them and help them find a solution to it.

• If your child is not opening up or hesitating, then take talk to them every day. Get them to open up to you more. Keep yourself updated with their interests and stay connected. This will help them to feel closer to you, which will make them share their feelings and issues with you.

• Remember to thank them in the end with a warm hug. It takes a lot of courage to talk about things, which makes them awkward. Thank them for trusting you and letting you help them.

talking with-your-teen

Tackling or facing difficult conversations with your teenager is an indication that you have a healthy relationship with your kid. It helps build trust between you and your child and keeps you close to them.

Try not to avoid these discussions, as they are very important in building up your child’s life and guiding them towards the right path by making wise choices.

Summary

• Having a conversation with teenagers can sometimes be very difficult. It’s normal to feel uncomfortable to talk to your child about topics like sex or drugs.
• But it’s important that you have these conversations as it provides direction and guides your children towards the right path.
• Staying calm and communicating with patients is the first step to have a good start towards a healthy conversation.
• It’s very important that you listen to your child. Not just listen but listen with understanding. All they want is to be heard.
• Having full knowledge of something helps children make sensible and responsible decisions.

Malathi

Malathi A Ganesh is a B. Com Graduate, NTT, M.A (Lit), PGDEA (PG in Education Administration), PGDCA (PG Diploma in Computer Application), DTE (Diploma in Teaching English), ICEPT (International Certificate in Education Preschool Teaching) from Singapore and B. Ed. She has been in the field of education for the past 20 years and has an experience of running her own pre-school She is the Founder & Director Academics of Smartkidz Educare India Pvt Ltd with 275+ play schools Pan India. She is an Educationist and a Child Psychologists by profession who wants to fulfill her dream of giving Quality Education to children in their earlier years. She is also into conducting positive parenting workshops, which talks about effective child rearing. She has conducted numerous parenting workshops in all her pre schools, schools and MNC’s.

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